Constantine (PG) [3.5 Stars]

Rating:	★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Science Fiction & Fantasy

Based on the DC-Vertigo comic book Hellblazer, Constantine is a fantasy/horror/suspense/action drama. John Constantine (Keanu Reeves) a renegade occultist who has literally been to hell and back. Rejected by heaven, he is fighting demons to earn his way back up. When Constantine teams up with skeptical policewoman Angela Dodson (Rachel Weisz) to solve the mysterious suicide of her twin sister, their investigation takes them through the world of demons and angels that exists among us.

I'm not a DC-Vertigo comics reader, so I know nutz about this movie. It's Matrix of the underworld, the way I see it. Some nice CG SFX; especially "Hell", but I find that something is lacking...it's like...it's there but not quite there kinda feelin'. I think it needed more demon fighting scenes. Still, I'm a sucker for fantasy flicks...that tells you things aren't always what they seems to be. Darkness is not necessary bad & Light may be bringing you real darkness. The ending sorta reminded me of Dogma...hmm fan of Kevin Smith?

Not bad for a debut director. I wonder if he is a non-smoker? Throughout the movie you'll see lots of anti-smokin' messages. 90% of the show focused on Keanu, everybody else are just supporting. He didn't act any differently from his Matrixs though...but he sure suits the role...that tired of living kinda face...

1 more plus point! I've always been telling people that crabs, lobsters & prawns are actually insects of the sea! I'm glad that this movie agrees with me! Take note of the Insect Demon! ;)

Go see it. Prepare yourself for the sequel! Lastly, please don't leave the theater as soon as the end credits starts to roll, stay till the end, extra goodie!

Director: Francis Lawrence
Written by: Kevin Brodbin, Mark Bomback, Frank Cappello
Studio: Warner Bros. Pictures
Cast: Keanu Reeves, Rachel Weisz, Shia LaBeouf, Tilda Swinton, Pruitt Taylor Vince, Djimon Hounsou, Gavin Rossdale

1 star for Hell, 1 for the Demons, 1 for the Man himself - Satan (now, I know how to cure terminal illnesses) & 1/2 for the Crab...(Hah! in your faces, seafood lovers!)

iStress, iHappy, iAmazed!

Been Freakin' buzy & stress with offis workz, freelance proposalz, room shiftin' etc...

Went to iKea with Mok last week. Saw some shelves & lights dat r perfect for my new room...but the shift was halted due to CNY & workz...

Cina Cock Year holidays came & went...but I didn't have a chance to rest...coz I sorta work tru it...Offis had added extra tasks for me. Now I havta do copy writing as well...*pullin' self hair...*

As if thatz not murderous 'nuff, somebody approached me with a freelance design job. Though I m dying, I took it coz I need $$$...I stayed hom over the weekend to do as much as possible (on Mok's PowerBook! Thnx Dude!). If they like my design...Woohoo~! If they dun like...D'oh!!! No deal!!!

On the Happier note, Mok told me dat Josephine has helped me get *Tha-Da* - 功夫 (DTS版) (限量發行真皮禮盒裝) aka Kung Fu Hustle (Leather DVD Cover Deluxe Gift Box Limited Edition) from HK!!! Thnx Babe *ahem...platonic way*!

Late last nite (around 1am...juz reached hom from offis...), I was soooo amazed with Tong Tong's diet. I read from the web dat besides insects, Mantis feed on small lizards too. So, being a curious old "school boy", I caught 1 for Tong Tong. Snap! Snap! The lizard is Dead! *hey it rhymes!* She gripped it with her spiky pincer like front legs & began to chow on it. Neck 1st to minimize the struggle, followed through were bones crushin' noises (soft but clear) as she chewed! It took about 20 mins for her to consume the entire 4cm lizard! You may think I'm sick!!! But to me it's "Animal Planet Live!". Wanna noe watz sick? Fear Fucktors r Fuckin' Sick!!! Anyway, the lizard didn't go without showing Tong Tong a piece of its mind...it took a "dump" on her pincer!

Sorry~ no gross pix of the feast...but chk out Tong Tong's make-over shot!

iName

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I	Inspirational
N	New
Z	Zany

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Dear Tong Tong~

Nope! Not the late Leslie Chueng's gay lover! It's my pet, a lady Praying Mantis.

I've always liked predatory bugs like scorpions, spiders & mantises. However, they are rarely seen around (ok,ok, I'm not talkin' about the tiny spiders that you see everyday), especially when I'm living in concrete jungle HDB.

One morning about two months ago, when I was about to leave for work, I saw this beautiful green creature in front of my lift - Praying Mantis. It's almost like seeing Sora Aoi (Jap AV star) nude tanning in front of me. Like the Flash~ I took the lizard tank from my store room (ya,ya, I used to keep a pet Bearded Dragon too, Siew Kiong was its name), & try to catch it. As I approached it, instead of fleeing, It actually came to me...*aww~ how sweet~ I quickly lured it into the tank, closed it & flew to work! At a pet shop near my office, I bought 50 cents worth of meal worms for her. Damn! that was alota worms!

The name "mantis" comes from the Greek word for 'prophet' or 'soothsayer.' (don't ask me why...I???) Too deep...I need to name her something sweeter, so I came up with Tong Tong. Tong Long is mantis in Cantonese, Tong can also mean sugar. There, a perfect name! *Wee~

Ever since Tong Tong's arrival, I would feed her nightly with meal worms, beetles, moths, spiders or even cicada that I can find around my block. By far, the cicada was the most interesting, it actually made buzzin' sound when Tong Tong is feeding on her. As she chewed on, the inside of the cicada was something you won't learn in biology class. It resembled a severed prawn! If I had a DV, I'd record the whole thing down.

Until about a month later, I saw her hanging only around the log I put in. When I looked closer, to my woo~hooness, I saw her eggs attached to the side of the log. Obviously, she had some "nasty" before I met her.

Soon after that, her food was running out, so I decided to leave the top cover opened for her to gain freedom again, but she never leave. I took her out & left her on a potted plant at my corridor, she's still around to-date. I wish she'll fly away, I hate to see the death of my pet.

Kung Fu Hustle 功夫 (PG)

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Comedy

Finally, Kung Fu Hustle DVD in Cantonese! (...pirated, got conned by fuckin' china mainlander in Aussie...but I'll definitely buy the original HK DVD once it's out!) I've sworn never to watch any Hong Kong movies in spore cinemas because they're dubbed in fuckin' mandarin or hokkien. No Cantonese movie are allowed since the late 70s...or early 80s (I don't really care!) because they are in Cantonese, Cantonese is a dialect, & it's "speak mandarin" campaign's biggest obstacle! The funny thing is that spore's own jack neo can screen his fuckin' 95% hokkien movies without any problem...localize, the officials said, localize this "NAH BEI *DOOT* *DOOT* *DOOT*"! (I don't do hokkien profanity! I'm not that LOW!)

Oops! Gettin' way out of point...

Okay! Back to Hong Kong king of comedy Stephen Chow's latest - and possibly greatest - cinema comedy, which needed only one week to become Hong Kong's largest grossing film of 2004.

Chow stars as Sing, a wannabe gangster in pre-war 1940s Shanghai, who thought that his sole purpose in life is to be admitted into the toughest triad in the region: the Axe Gang. Sing and his sidekick (Lam Chi Chung) were trying to proclaim rundown Pigsty Alley to be their first official "territory." However, Sing is more futile than fearsome, and his antics only annoy the residents of Pigsty Alley - and attract the attention of the Axe Gang, led by Brother Sum (Chan Kwok Kwan). But Pigsty Alley has its own secrets: unknown to Sing and the Axe Gang, hidden kung-fu masters prowl the poverty-stricken streets, ready to defend their turf to the bitter end!

Watching it in Cantonese really proved that my wait was worthwhile! mandarin version really kills the essence of Kung Fu Hustle. Through every climatic scenes, I can understand all the pressures Stephen Chow was under. They all hit at the perfect spots & timings. Best example is when the Landlord (Yuen Wah) & Landlady (Yuen Qiu) decided to reveal their skills. Stephen Chow also brought a few familiar faces back to the screen (kidz won't know who they are...).

I had very high expectation on Kung Fu Hustle & it surpasses all my expectations!!! Wish I could watch it in Cantonese in a cinema...

A superbly entertaining movie which blend state-of-the-art special effects, dazzling martial arts (choreographed by Yuen Woo Ping & Samo Hung) & hilarious slapstick comedy! If you like Hong Kong Comedies & Comics, you'll love this movie!

One star for Stephen Chow as an actor, one for Yuen Qiu, & 3 for Stephen Chow as the director!

Cast:
Stephen Chow, Lam Chi Chung, Chan Kwok Kwan, Yuen Wah, Yuen Qiu, Tin Kai Mun, Leung Siu Lung

*The soon to be released Official Hong Kong DVD version of Kung Fu Hustle will contain the uncut version of the film and an exclusive booklet!!! It's on the Top Spot of my wish list! Go Buy It!

Finding Neverland (PG)

Rating:	★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Drama

A tale of magic and fantasy inspired by the life of James M Barrie (Johnny Depp), the real-life author of the children's classic Peter Pan. Set in London in 1904, the film follows Barrie's creative journey to bring Peter Pan to life, from his first inspiration for the story up until the play's premiere at the Duke of York's Theatre - a night that will change not only Barrie's own life, but the lives of everyone close to him.

Like James Barrie, most of us have a side of door that needs to be re-opened or discovered. Very often, it is shut due to growing social pressures & responsibilities. The Key to the door is a Spiritual connection with someone or something. Behind this door you will find a New World full of Surprises & Inspirations. A line I really like from James Barrie, “Don’t send the kids to bed. They grow a year older everytime they wake up. Before you know it, it’s all over.”

Johnny Depp’s charismatic performance is like a fine wine that gets better as the years go by. Not at his best yet, but we’ll see...his British accent sounded a bit weird though.

The four sons of the young widow Sylvia Llewelyn Davies’ (Kate Winslet) - George, Jack, Peter & Michael managed to steal some of the scenes from the leads. I don’t usually enjoy shows with kids in them (esp, Hooks, Goonies, Home Alone, Spy Kids, etc). I find them irritating, & the directors tried too hard to make them “fakey” cute! As for the Davies kids, I applaud for their great natural performances.

I'm slightly disappointed because there isn't enough of James' fantasy world. Overall, Finding Neverland does deserves its 7 Oscar Nominations

Director: Marc Forster
Written by: David Magee
Studio: Miramax Films
Cast: Johnny Depp, Kate Winslet, Julie Christie, Radha Mitchell, Dustin Hoffman

A star for Mr Depp, two for the kids & one for the script.

I wanna hav dat "LAW" in da house!

British homeowners can kill intruders in self-defence!!!

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/homeowners-can-kill-burglars-in-selfdefence-government-says-483154.html

I like! I like! I've always believe in justice violence! Kill'em before they kill you & your family!

Man (not fagots) has always been on the front line in family protections. Law was never on our side when it comes to "murder in self defence". What are you gonna do when a "dope-low-life-maggot" crawled into your home, where your love ones sleep?
1: Are you gonna hide under your bed?
2: Strike him down like a cockroach?
3: Leave it to the police after you & your family's maggoty bodies were discovered?

Option 2 is what I'll do without thinking.

To begin with, breaking an entry is already an offense. Why should mercy be shown upon criminals who wanna bring lost to you in one way or another? Nobody can play ignorant over breaking into a house. The motives are obvious (you don't have to be a judge to know that). Which once again, means that they're guilty.

On the other hand, me as the man of the house is innocent from long before the break-in. Hurting or Killing the intruder is not on the to-do list of the day. In fact, I should receive a medal for stopping crime!

Sure, you'll say that the intruder is a human being, but so are my family & myself. Better him than us! Anyway, he deserves it!

"Never" "Ever" mess with a man's home or family! You try it, you pay for it with your blood!

Hope the law applies here too! In the mean time, applause for the land of Fish & Chips!

Kinsey (R21)

Rating:	★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Drama

Alfred Kinsey (Liam Neeson), the pioneer of human sexuality research. Spanning six decades from his childhood in the early 1900s to his death in 1956, the film turns the microscope on the man whose landmark studies on the sexual behaviors of the common man that rocked a nation. The interviewer of tens of thousands, Kinsey subjected his own life and that of his researchers to the same type of analysis that produced his 1948 best-selling book "Sexual Behavior in the Human Male".

The film explained to me the simple fact that most people deny - Morality (which is generated by some religions or traditions) is Science’s biggest obstruction. Researches like Evolution (btw, I don’t agree with this theory), Cloning, & in this movie Sexuality.

Kinsey offers you an open & positive look at all issues related to human sexual activities. Not in details (duh...or it will be a 5 hours movie), but an idea. Something we still need in this era. However, the queer part gave me the creeps...(ok! I’m homophobic!). I admire the passion & spirit Kinsey had for all his researches, from gull wasp to female orgasm.

Not a breakthrough performance from the cast, but good enough. Horny people please take note that this is not an erotic film! (No wonder Chinatown R21 "ah peh" cinema is not showing this movie!)

Cast:
Liam Neeson, Laura Linney, Chris O’Donnell, Peter Sarsgaard, Timothy Hutton, John Lithgow, Tim Curry, Oliver Platt, Dylan Baker

3 stars for the subject, 1 for the entire cast.

*what ever happened to Kinsey's daughters & son?